Hey Chad.

I think we need to talk…I’m a little disappointed in your reaction to this Facebook pickle campaign.  I know your “cool” status has been slippin over the past few years and while I’ve never bought an album or a concert ticket, I’m not a hater.   I realize the ego you have and how difficult it must be to deal with the fact that you’re not as popular as you used to be… but why did you go “dick”??  Did none of your buddies say, “Hey Chad, this is hilarious!  Lets prove to them that we have a sense of humor and invite the pickle to open up for us??”  You could have called it “Pickelback”???  The possibilities were endless but instead you had to threaten the pickle.

Dont be surprised when someone starts the next campaign to get a turd more fans than your band.

Sincerely,

Red

*Update* – Chad’s threats were apparently bogus but I’m gonna keep this up anyway because I think it is funny.